The Bachelor: Paris

The Bachelor: Paris Recaps

• 'The Bachelor' recap: There Is No Joy in Panama, Mighty Casey Has Struck Out

  Welcome to Panama City (which is in Panama, which makes sense). We get the cheesy airplane-flies-over-map graphic again, and then the women arrive at their...

• 'The Bachelor' recap: I've Got You Under My Skinny Dipping

  We're on lovely Vieques Island in Puerto Rico. I've recapped several seasons of this mess by now, and I think I've figured out how the...

• 'The Bachelor' recap: It's Raining, Ben. Hallelujah!

  So the first few few minutes of The Bachelor tonight were cut off because of a governor's speech, and when we join the women, they've...

• 'The Bachelor' recap: Shawntel? More like "Yawntel," amirite?

  Ben Flanimal and the brain-dead bachelorettes are descending on San Francisco, which is the kind of thing the Centers for Disease Control should probably issue...

• 'The Bachelor' recap: "What Do You Get When You Cross a Gingerbread Man With a Hooker?"

  Sonoma, California, home of Ben Flajninkva, who is ecstatic because eighteen beautiful women are coming to vie for his affections. The women are currently in...

• 'The Bachelor' recap: "...And the horse you rode in on."

  Meet Ben Flanjnjnik! He's from one of my favorite seasons of The Bachelor/ette -- i.e. any season I didn't watch -- and apparently he proposed...